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Mourning the Morning

Parents of SMQ always sagely warned that "nothing good happens out after midnight," which he has gauged through careful scientific analysis to be only partially false. Much more accurate would be, "nothing at all happens before noon" when applied to the hours immediately following the din and fleeting disaster of the early morning, as SMQ today is in all too well a position to confirm.

The unproductive mind consequently wanders in such stupors to something like the fan devotion quiz esteemed author Warren St. John put up last week on Fanopticon, and is met with stinging results:

Your Score: 28

Your Ranking:
0 - 30: You call yourself a fan? We've seen more zeal on a croquet court. What do you say we grab a couple of cold ones and head down to the big chess tourney?

...which hurt SMQ on at least the same fundamental level of pride as the tepid returns on the essay portion of his GRE earlier this week. The reaction is also the same: it's the test's fault! Not enough time to organize a coherent thought; questions based on comparing the test-taker with insane persons. The couple who skipped their daughter's wedding for an Alabama-Tennessee game, SMQ "understands where those people are coming from." He becomes depressed - and in fact is currently depressed, since you mentioned it - from contemplating horrible Saint/Southern Miss defeats witnessed years ago. If the path to genuine zealotry in lined with "pink panty pulldowns," sir, then...actually, that sounds like a pretty delicious path. But at baloney logs, the line is drawn.

The RJYH valedictorian